Okay since I was up to my eyeballs in biology notes last night, I just watched this episode. And before we jump into the recap, can I just say…WHAT IN THE ACTUAL F WAS THIS EPISODE?!!! Too much. I literally paused like 230948 times to calm myself down.
Remember, I recap as I watch the episode. Apologies in advance for unnecessary conniptions mid-episode.
*****Major spoilers ahead, be warned*****
Previously on The Walking Dead…flashback to Rick on a walkie talkie. MORGAN AND DUANE ARE COMING BACK TODAY I JUST KNOW IT.
Who is Erin. What is going on? And out of the blue this new dude comes chasing!! And Carl is all “I don’t even care” about it because he’s apparently a man now. Yea, sure. Then Michonne gets stuck in the mud, and of course, thats when the ZOMBIES ATTACK! Keep cool though, Rick has got this under control. And Carl…whoa whoa whoa. I’d like to see you drive, you probably can’t even reach the pedals. So be quiet. And then poor random dude is left behind. So much for that story line.
OH!! I JUST GOT IT! They’re back in Rick’s hometown! WHICH MEANS HELLO DUANE AND MORGAN! Come out, come out wherever you are!!! Rick is all “I was the police, b*tch” and Michonne is all “whoops, duh, your name IS Sheriff Rick”. But Michonne is now all sad and submissive! Probably because she heard Carl, that little twerp, getting all feisty about her. Rude, Carl, rude. And then some symbolic bullet exchange happens (I feel there was meaning behind that…).
Rick see a lovely graveyard and throws Carl in. Just kidding. But they also stumble upon spray paint arrows! What could they mean?! Duane?! Morgan?! (Yes I’m obsessed with their reappearance, if it doesn’t happen this episode I will go into cardiac arrest) Weird quotes are literally all over the place and its stressing me out.
I can’t help but OMG WALKER ALERT! PERSON ALERT! I BET ITS MORGAN!! Cease fire!! I know who it is!! AND WTF CARL YOU LITTLE SHIT! JUST SHOOTS THE FREAKING MAN! You idiot!!! And watch, its going to be Morgan, I know it. BOOM!! IT IS!!! I CALLED IT!! And Carl the twerp just shot him!!! Thank the freaking lord he had protection!
I AM SO HAPPY ITS MORGAN. Also, I told you so. But where is Duane?! And I predict either horrible things or excellent thing from this reunion, nothing in between. Man, Morgan has gone crazay with these traps (not to mention the “Not Shitting You” sign…I hope he knows walkers can’t read). OH NOOOOO RICK FINDS THE WALKIE TALKIE! I am literally crying my eyes out. NOOO DUANE TURNED! Thats it. I’m done. I’m crying so hard I am turning into a raisin. This is too much. Michonne, shut your face, you don’t even get it. This is MORGAN. Without him, none of this story would have happened. AH RICKS HOUSE ON THE MAP! Cue more hysteria. And then…the most glorious moment of my whole existence…Rick smizes into the camera and I melt into a pool of tears. Amen.
Zombies! Now’s your chance! Eat Carl! Orrrrr let him run away from Michonne like the little idiot he is. DO YOU NOT GET THIS CARL?! We are in a zombie apocalypse! THIS IS NOT RECESS!!!!
When Morgan wakes up and him and Rick (possibly) hug it out, I will dissolve into nothingness because I will be so emotional. AHHH HE’S UP!!! Except this is definitely NOT hugging it out….put that knife down! It’s Rick! You know him!! I cannot handle this!! WTF MORGAN STABS RICK I AM CRYING WHAT IS HAPPENING OMG OMG OMG MY BABY!!!!!!!! MY EYEBALLS ARE ACTUALLY POPPING OUT OF THEIR SOCKETS!!
Break for a walker kill. Calming myself. Dear lord.
Morgan has gone bonkers. BUT HE RECOGNIZES RICK!!! IM CRYING! IM LOSING IT! No. Not the walkie talkies. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH STOP IT. FEEL ALL THE FEELS! My poor heart is breaking. Rick tried his best, Morgan, believe me! Sidenote, did Rick really just get stabbed, like I am still processing this. OH MY GAAAAWD HIS WIFE TURNED DUANE!!!!! BAWLING! THIS POOR MAN! Morgan and Rick should go to therapy together or something, combined they have experienced enough tragedy to last 10 lifetimes. But Rick, like the man he is, has pulled through his psychopathic mourning stage. Morgan, its your turn now! You can do it!!
Carl continues his shenanigans. And now Michonne is his babysitter. Hahaha.
Zombies unleash their terror on some poor rats…except for this one troll zombie. WHO ATTACKS CARL BUT MICHONNE SNIPES IT! See Carl?! Michonne just saved your stupid life. They turn the corner and boom! TROUBLE! I am profusely sweating. Once they make it out, Michonne lays down the law and puts the little idiot in his place. No. More. Bullshit. Preach, girl! And she’s back already, picture in hand. Awwww and this is actually a heartfelt moment with Carl looking a the picture. I am smiling. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MICHONNE WHIPS OUT A FREAKING RAINBOW CAT!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHA!!!!! I AM LITERALLY ROFLING SO HARD!!! BEST MOMENT OF SEASONS 1, 2, AND 3 BY FAR!!!
Morgan, you are very intuitive and I see you and Rick making an excellent team. You would be the voice of reason (once you stop being so crazy) and Rick would be the man. Perfect balance. I still don’t understand how Rick is so unphased by being stabbed though…shouldn’t he be lying down? And words of wisdom from my beloved recovered psychopath!! Out of everyone, Rick would understand! But Morgan needs to ‘clear’. So just as we found him, we’ve lost him. That sucks monkey balls.
Look at all them zombies, how cute. Okay I am seriously anticipating Ricks reaction to this family picture. Hysteria will ensue. I seriously wish Morgan would join them though.
Carl now approves of Michonne, as if his opinion had any validity in the first place. But thats nice I suppose. Then Rick and Michonne bond of hallucinations of dead people.
As the end scenes breeze by and that song starts to play, I am bawling again. Too many emotions for one episode. If the show continues like this I will need to get myself a LifeAlert button or something.
TEAM RICK: Morgan made his reappearance!!! But where is everyone else?! Daryl?! Also, Rick is stabbed but not really, since he is functioning just fine.
TEAM WOODBURY: Thankfully not one appearance. Also I found out I’ve been spelling it wrong all this time. Shows how much I care about you, Pirate Philip.
TEAM ZOMBIE: Failed to kill Carl.
FAVOURITE MOMENT: Okay serious internal debate between Rick’s smize (drool…) and Michonnes cat (GIANT LOL).